Talk about TOWNIE by Dubus

10 Apr

 One of my professors from college is a friend of Andre Dubus III and greatly respects and admires his father as well.  I will be honest, so far I haven’t been able to finish The House of Sand and Fog. I also own The Garden of Last Days, which I bought for a novel-writing class, but never even cracked the cover.  When I heard about Dubus’ newest book, Townie, I was intrigued for several reasons.  It was reviewed very favorably by the New York Time’s Book Review and it was a departure from Dubus’ usual path of fiction. Now, after starting Dubus’ memoir I not only feel like I have a better glimpse into understanding his fiction, but also into himself as a writer and as a son of a very famous writer.

I found an advanced reading copy of Townie in paperback in a small bookstore in Chelsea on my lunch break and couldn’t resist ($6!). As a editorialist (I’m not sure how I feel about that word, but that is a subject for another post), the idea of an advanced reading copy, with typos and all, is really magical.  I’m still reading the book, but I’m flying through it because the narrative is propelling.

The book is definitely as it is described—violent.  But there are many moments when a person who has never been in a fight can relate to Dubus and his description of himself as a townie. Firstly, there are several instances in the book when Dubus is put in a world he doesn’t understand. He is a foreigner in his own town, unaware of the lingo, unprepared for people’s’ reactions and behavior.  For example, his father throws a baseball with Andre bare-handed one day and is surprised by his son’s lack of experience with America’s pastime.  Andre goes to his first baseball game with his friend Sam and doesn’t know or understand the terms like strike, pitch, curve ball, out.  Another example is when his father’s young third wife tells Andre she grew up in Manhattan.  He has never heard of Manhattan before and feels ashamed. It is something we can all relate to—that feeling of remembering the first time you heard a term or word and how it changed your life. That seems strange to say, but I really believe learning a new word, or a new world like baseball for that matter, can change a persons’ life. 

I went to college in a small town where there were a lot of working people, trying to make a living in a slightly depressed area. The three bars in town housed all the townspeople and the University students. On Friday’s, the most popular bar, Bot’s, was where the townies went after working all week to unwind.  I would still go to Bot’s on Fridays, but my friends and I were the few college kids who did. There were old men, in their 70s and younger men and women who worked at the mall and the car dealerships and restaurants on the Strip as the populated highway where Routes 11 and 15 met, people who we saw daily walking Market Street or pumping our gas at Sheetz.  The only time we really interacted with them besides in the restaurants and the mall was in the bar. This book gives me a totally different perspective on those people I shared a town with for four years. Dubus takes the word townie and embraces it, encapsulates it, and runs from it.

As a writer myself, I write primarily fiction, but with my experiences as a commuter in New York City I have been considering writing a memoir.  Dubus’ book has really helped me think about how I would structure such a book and how I would choose important scenes and experiences to illustrate my current state as a bridge-and-tunnel-er.

Now, I will go finish Townie because this book is really a crowning moment for Dubus in my mind. And I believe I will go back and read Dubus’ other books as well.

Tubbs Romp to Stomp Out Breast Cancer!

2 Jan

I am very excited to be participating in a snowshoe walk to raise money for the North New Jersey affiliate of Susan G. Komen for the Cure.  On January 22nd, at Mountain Creek my friend and I will be participating.  We did a little practicing with snowshoes that my mom bought my sister and I for Christmas one year.  We had a great time romping around my backyard, but quickly learned the snowshoes I have aren’t going to cut it.  We are planning on renting snowshoes now.  I think this is going to be a great opportunity to try a new activity and raise money for breast cancer research.  Check out the website! http://tubbsromptostomp.com/home  And come out on January 22nd to start the New Year off right!

Snowshoeing!

Ready to Romp to Stomp out Breast Cancer!

The Workplace: No Place for Socializing?

29 Dec

Tomorrow is my last day at my temporary position. The position isn’t in the field I want to be in at all and the work is getting tedious so I am excited to move on. Not to mention the fact that my dad works at the same company and says he spent his entire bonus buying me lunch every day. So much for the value of quality father/daughter time!

Anyway, although the position wasn’t my dream first job, I did learn things about general office behavior. I am proud to say that I was only late to work once, by five minutes. I was lucky to have such a short commute, but punctuality has always been important to me.  I realized how invaluable it is to an employer to have a punctual employee as well. Especially at a temporary position where they are paying you to work, not to contribute to the company culture by socializing or thieving away company time.  Okay, maybe I sound like an unsociable person, but as a temporary employee paid by the hour at a job where output is key, I truly felt like I should be doing as much work as possible.  I know, I know. I want to say to myself, “Well, aren’t you a good little worker. Daddy must be proud in his corner office.” My dad doesn’t quite have a corner office, but it is very close to the corner.  I have never been a big small talker.  That just isn’t part of my personality.  With my close friends I am a regular chatterbox, at work I’m just more reserved. 

On the other hand, I do think I could improve upon my inter-office communication skills.  I think my quietness sometimes came off as rudeness at work.  “Allie, you’re sooo quiet!” In my next position I think I will make more of an effort to strike a balance between hard work and creating good relationships with coworkers.  Because after all, there is a place in the workplace for ugly sweater contests and bagel Fridays.  What is life without the little things to make the day more pleasant?

My goals for my next position are to continue to show what a hard worker I am, to be vocal about my work (if I want more challenges to ask for them, if I want constructive criticism ask how I can improve, etc.), and to build strong relationships with my coworkers and superiors.  I am excited for this to come and who knows, maybe I’ll make some good “work friends” in the future.

“I Can Read You Like A Book” and Other Things Men Have Said to me

10 Nov

At the risk of getting too personal, I’m going to share the most hurtful thing a male has ever said to me: “I can read you like a book.”  These words were said to me at the end of a relationship, as we were breaking up, and they have stuck with me.  As a person who tries to understand those I encounter, make sense of what drives them, what makes them happy, and their failings, that kind of  dismissal is hard to bear.  Even worse—the use of a tired clique pertaining to one of  my favorite things: books.  How rude!

But at 23, single, unemployed, and living at home, I am actually the happiest I have been in a very long time.  That brings me to what a more positive male influence reminded me.  My best guy friend from college (who witnessed the aforementioned breakup demolish me temporarily) sent me a funny website with a slide show titled “Why I Hate My Friend’s Girlfriend.”  The website made me think that some best friends of my exes may have been tempted to write a similarly titled Powerpoint about me or even a whole thesis! I may have been flawed in past relationships, but I’m a great friend and a great person.  I am supportive and open.  I spill my heart out when I feel comfortable with someone.  I definitely fared better in my last relationship than with Mr. Open Book.  I think the key change has been that I am happy with myself.  What more could a guy ask for than a secure woman?

And that brings me to my father, who has given me the security to pursue my goals, and has passed on a high regard for little old me.  Because he believes in me unceasingly, I tend to dream big, and in turn hold myself to a high standard.  If I had any other father, I probably wouldn’t have been a writing major or be continuing my search for a job in publishing.  My father,  a Catholic school boy at heart, sends me a certain televangelist’s e-newsletters every day.  Outwardly, he wouldn’t strike most people as religious or spiritual, but my dad’s spirituality has gotten him through some tough times.  And he constantly reminds me to be optimistic and persevere. 

I will probably continue to be an open person and trust that others will relish that opportunity to get to know me well. Being an open book can also mean being open to possibilities.  With a few good men in my life, I’m sure I will keep learning more about myself not only from them and their forwards, but also from their support.

Ode to New Jersey

15 Sep

New Jersey has gotten such a bad rap lately with the Real Housewives of New Jersey (Teresa lives in my town, although maybe not for much longer with her money troubles), Jersey Shore (Seaside was the place to be after prom), and Jerseylicious (I went to high school with Olivia, I’ll admit it).  But honestly, Jersey isn’t all about guidos, big hair, and tanning! It is frustrating that some people are so closed-minded to stereotype all New Jerseyans as scum.  And if one more person makes a joke about how smelly Jersey is I will explode.  New Jersey is a great place to live.  I got a good education here.  I go running in my town almost every day and it is gorgeous and smells great.  We have the luxury of being close to New York City, but there is also culture, history, and fun to be had right here in NJ.  Okay, I can’t really speak for ALL of New Jersey.  All I know is that Northern New Jersey is a great place to live.  I can’t speak for South Jersey because I have never lived there, but I always enjoy going to the beach down the shore.  So here is my list of things to do in New Jersey.  Instead of judging, people should visit and be open to New Jersey and its residents. 

1. the Morristown Green: There is so much to do in Morristown, but the green is a great place to just sit on a bench and take it all in. 

2. TCBY in Parsippany: Although my favorite Charlie no longer owns the TCBY, it is still delicious.  Frozen yogurt is healthy and delicious!  And TCBY is open pretty late for an ice cream joint. 

3.  More in Morristown: If you’re looking for a full-day outing Morristown is perfect. First, check out Washington’s Headquarters where George Washington spent the winter with his army.  It is historic and great for kids.  Also great for families is the Morristown Museum.  The Museum has beautiful art and unique exhibits.  There is also a train display which I remember loving as a kid.  The Frelinghuysen Arboretum is a must-see.  The grounds of the mansion are beautiful to look at and include winding paths and brilliant gardens.  And it is FREE! If you are hungry there are lots of great places to eat in Morristown.  The Famished Frog is great for families.  The Office is fun for food and trivia or happy hour.  Pazzo Pazzo is elegant and has a great outdoor area.  Take your pick! And stop at Century 21 for lux fashions at great prices. If you are looking for nightlife in Mo-town as I like to call it, take my favorite bar tour and hit up the best spots before 2 AM closing time.  First, go to the Dark Horse.  It is called the DARK Horse for a reason.  The basement setting is dank and dark, but hey the drinks are cheap and the music is loud.  Next stumble about 500 yards to Sona 13.  This two-floor bar is my favorite for dancing and  hanging out.  The booth tables are great to sit with friends and enjoy some pitchers of beer.  Each floor has different music.  The lower level has more of a lounge feel.  They usually start kicking out people earlier than two, so then it is the perfect time to head on over to the Grasshopper.  A fun, Irish pub, the Grasshopper has two floors, live music and a dj on some nights.  It is always a good time.  Take a cab that is sitting outside the Grasshopper home and get some rest after a day well spent in NJ!

4. Check out Denville, NJ: Denville is another great town to explore.  Paint some pottery with the kids at Brushes & Bisque.  It is fun for grownups too. Then, have some lunch at Mara’s or The American Heritage Grill.  Both have great sandwiches.  If you want some desert Denville Dairy is a must.  But the lines get very long.  If you aren’t a fan of waiting Miami Rice is around the corner, with rice pudding, frozen yogurt, ice cream, and outdoor seating.  Two great dinner options are Hunan Taste, an ornate Chinese food restaurant, or Veggie Heaven, a great vegan/vegetarian restaurant. 

5.  Montville  Park:  I have to shout out my home town and say Montville has a great park with something for all ages.  The playground is fantastic with a section for young children and for older children.  You can also play shuffle board, bocce, sand volleyball, soccer, basketball, tennis, or run on the track.  The youth center is a great safe hang out for the kids in town.  The snack bar is located by the basketball courts. 

6. Hoboken, NJ:  Hoboken has everything.  Great nightlife, great food, the path train to NYC, and best of all Carlos’ Bakery from Cake Boss.

That should get you started on discovering Northern NJ and seeing how much the Garden State has to offer.  Take that haters!

Where have you been all my life?

13 Sep

I haven’t felt like writing on my blog in a while because, well, life just hasn’t been that eventful for me. Here is a quick recap on what has transpired. I went to DC. I went to PA. I tried on bridesmaid dresses and fell in love with a Vera Wang (big surprise). I started a new workout plan. I have been trying my best to eat healthier (I am really loving goat cheese and apples right now). I’m probably taking my sister to a concert in a few weeks (Am I really of chaperone age?). My bangs are growing out and I like them much better right now. I tried a few different Oktoberfest beers this weekend. Not bad since October happens to be my favorite month. I read a little in my book called the Creative Writing MFA Handbook by Tom Kealey. Is that a possibility right now? Not sure. But right now the hub of publishing, the city that never sleeps, the big apple seems to have other plans for me.

I made a list earlier in the summer of things I wanted to accomplish while at home, unemployed and free. Since I like to stay in the positive, I’ll list the ones I did do first:
Hiking, beach outing, 5K, NYC, visit friends, travel to a state I have never been to (Maine), visit Morristown, NJ and Hoboken, NJ more, have fun with high school and college friends, take my dad’s advice, visit my big sister in my sorority, try a spin class, go to the pool.

Some things I have not yet accomplished include: sunless tanning (tried it once, maybe it isn’t something to do again. Fake and bake), be economical (fail), try different hairstyles, go to Dave and Buster’s, rock climbing, kayaking, tubing.

I’d say I have been pretty successful this summer at doing the things I wanted to do. I think I had some unexpected fun along the way as well. One thing on my to do list that I really want to focus on is writing more. I read a ton, but sometimes I have this stigma for myself that If I put my pen to the paper or my fingers to the keys and write sometime less than stellar then it is somehow a waste or a shame. So this is my rebellion against myself. Sometimes you need to just write what comes out. Even if it isn’t pretty or lyrical or gramatically correct. I’m a really fun person. I’m surprised at myself for being uptight at times. Chill out. Enjoy the time you have right now. If you learned anything from four years as a writing major the point of writing isn’t to write well. It is to write badly but edit and rewrite and then surpise! you might write something better than you originally conceived.

So this is my entry of bad blogging. But you know what? I think it is soo bad it is good. Anyway there is always someone worse out there on the world wide web (I mean did you see what Kanye did at the VMA’s tonight? Not a damn thing)!

Submissions and Admissions

8 Jul

I was reading through my grandfather’s papers once again.  It inspired me to look into submitting some of my short stories to literary journals.  He started getting published in the 1920s, just out of high school.  Since I did spend the last four years writing fiction, I suppose it might be interesting to try to submit some of it for publication.  Unfortunately, most of the magazines I found don’t accept submissions during the summer months, but I’m sure there are more out there looking for content.

 At a certain point in college I decided I wanted to be an editor and publish other people’s work.  I’m not quite sure why I felt that meant I couldn’t attempt to get my own work published.  I guess I didn’t want editors to think that I wanted a job at a book publishing company because I desperately want an “in” to get my own work out there.  I want a career in publishing because I like the feeling I get knowing that I edited that book and decided on the cover and picked that font and slaved over the computer screen making sure the finished product was as close to perfect as possible.  I like working in a business environment.   I like to learn about all the moving parts that get a book on the shelf, or online.  I like being around people. And writing is such a solitary job in so many ways.  But I really should take this time while I’m at home to write and edit my pieces. 

I also decided that while I am figuring out the best way to go about putting my grandfather’s body of work out there, I will catalog what I have.  In each manila folder there are loads of clippings.  And currently I just have the folders in plastic shopping bags from my grandmother’s house.  I feel like the next step is really to see all that I have and see how the best way to create a cohesive book  would be.  Maybe I will try to contact someone that might be able to give me advice. Or try to contact someone from where my grandfather was frequently published. 

So while I’m cataloging my grandfather’s work, I’m going to write my own.   I have been so immersed in cover letters and resumes and references that I forgot about the documents that were my drive to even go to college—short stories.  

Sidenote: I’m not giving up on getting a job.  I won’t be yielding to the pressure of the job search.  I am applying and interviewing and remaining excited by the prospects.  Among my grandfather’s papers there were many acceptance letters.  I’m sure there were rejection letters as well.  Rejection is part of life.  But I’m not afraid of rejection, at least not when it comes to submitting fiction or applying to jobs.  I’ve submitted myself to staying positive.  No surrendering here.

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